my Twilight movie review

[tiggz]

so here's the thing. the first time i saw it, i saw it with a group of friends and we went to a restaurant beforehand and i had some drinks. i had a feeling i was going to need to be a little tipsy do deal with the crazy fangirls and the oozing cheese that was sure to come onscreen. turns out the fangirls were really well behaved. they didn't even squeal the first time RPattz came onscreen. i was also sitting next to a girl(a stranger) who was a sarcastic bitch just like me. so we had a good time snarking.

that being said, i hated the movie the first time. there was one point where i was laughing so hard i thought i was going to pee my pants or get kicked out of the theatre. it was a toss up. if i'd had some hard-core fans around me, i probably wouldn't be typing this now. i'm sure i was obnoxious, but i could not help it.

so...okay. sunday, mom wanted to go see it and i told her i'd go with her because i wanted to see if it was as bad as i thought it was when i was completely sober. turns out? it's not awful, but it's still not good.

the good
- vampire baseball. that scene was pretty much the best thing about the movie. period. i could never really picture it in my head when reading the book. so it was nice to see it laid out. Jasper and the bat twirling was kinda hot. Alice with the leg kick was adorable. it was the first scene i semi-believed Nikki Reed as Rosalie too. she gave good bitchface.

- the painfully slow kiss in Bella's bedroom. probably the first time i felt RPattz and KStew had chemistry. also the first time i found RPattz hot. especially when he flung himself against the wall. rawr.

- the prom scene with them in the gazebo. the music was absolutely fabulous and i actually felt like they were Edward and Bella there.

- Alice hugging Bella when Edward takes her to the house to introduce her to the family. Ashley Greene was a great choice for Alice. she nails her.

- Charlie. pretty much any scene with him is right on. wonderful casting for him, as well.

- Billy/Charlie. i like that we're shown what good friends they are. and not to be repetitive, but great casting for Billy too.

- the humans were all pretty great too. i could have done without a lot of the childishness that was portrayed(worm scene, i'm looking at you.), but overall i loved Mike, Jessica, Angela and Eric. (Ben. where are you, Ben?!)

- Victoria! Laurent! James! i effing loved every one of them. Cam Gigandet has decided to make a career out of playing assholes and it totally works for him. i couldn't have cast a better Victoria if i'd tried. Rachelle is absolutely gorgeous and i want her hair. Laurent didn't have a whole lot to do, but we'll see more of him in the next movie, i hope.

the eh
- Taylor Lautner as Jacob. he was okay, i suppose. still not at all what i pictured and i still can't see him as New Moon Jacob at all. they made him a bit more useless in the movie than he even was in the book and that was disappointing as a staunch Team Jacob fan.

- KStew as Bella. i like that i wasn't subjected to Bella's incessant thoughts about how beautiful and god-like Edward is, but i thought she portrayed her a bit too strong. Bella isn't strong. she's a whiny, self-absorbed damsel in distress who really is the anti-feminist in so many ways.

- the Cullens house. i didn't like that it was so modern.

the bad
- RPattz's accent. it was distracting and took me out of the movie quite a bit.

- the make-up!! i mean, seriously. WTF?! i could have done a better job at making them look pale without looking like the make-up was caked on.

- the contacts were lacking, as well. if you're going to do close-ups on the vamp's eyes, at least fix it so we can't tell they're contacts in post.

- the running/jumping/flying. the running especially was truly awful. i would have preferred them to do what they do in Smallville where Clark runs so fast all you see is the zipzip flash of colors.

- KStew's blubbering in the final hospital scene and the part where she thinks James has her mom when she gets the phone call from home. she needs to work on that. a lot!

the downright criminal
- taking out the blood typing scene and replacing it with a totally unneccessary field trip that did nothing to move the plot along. at least with the blood typing we had Bella and Edward bonding and talking and Edward snarking at her. why change that? i just don't get it.

- changing the way Bella finds out about the "cold ones". she flirts(albeit badly) with Jacob and he tells her the whole story. she does go home and google, but it's only to confirm her theory. having her figure it out any other way doesn't make sense. especially in the order they decided to do it. i mean, Edward tells her he can read minds at dinner, but she doesn't think to bring up the things she googled? whatever. stupidstupidstupid.

- taking out awesome lines. "did you stab Edward Cullen with a pencil", "Edward Cullen is staring at you", "stupid, shiny volvo owner". these are awesome lines and should have been in the movie. no argument about it. if they can keep the completely cheesy "and so the lion fell in love with the lamb. stupid lamb. what a sick, masochistic lion." crap, they could've kept this stuff in. you know what i'm saying?

there's probably more that i'm forgetting, but yeah. this is the jist of it. didn't love it. didn't hate it. won't own it unless i end up loving the rest of movies and want a complete collection.

Comments

[missmarmalade.livejournal.com]

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!!!

Thank God. Thank you.

Every single thing you wrote...I feel EXACTLY the same way.

I've only see it once, but my gosh I was so disappointed. It felt rushed, & like SO much was missing. I went with someone that hadn't read the book & she felt lost through some of it.

The bad make up, the bad acting [esp. on Kristen's part], the horrible effects, the missing scenes & good one liners....ugh. I feel duped. All the hype, the wonderful photo spreads, the chemistry I thought I could see in stills & photo shoots...all just a big lie :/

It was worth it for the hot kissing scene & a few other choice moments, but yeah...not great. I'd still like to see it again, give it another go, but I hope & PRAY the second movie is better.

[tiggz.livejournal.com]

the pacing and the continuity were some of the worst i've ever seen. truly. i kinda forgot to mention that.

i think seeing it a second time, my standards were lower and i could enjoy it a bit more. i dunno.

[begliocchi.livejournal.com]

I feel bad that I want to go in an pick it apart. I mean, I'd like to be amused - heck, I hope I will be at least a few times for the price of admission! But...I worry that the only reason I want to go is to justify why I don't like it. Again, no offense meant to the Twilight fans. It's just not my cup of tea.

[tiggz.livejournal.com]

honestly? i don't see why anyone who isn't a fan would want to see this movie.

[begliocchi.livejournal.com]

I just want to see for myself how they visually interpreted the book. Who knows, maybe I'll like it more after the movie?

[ducky01.livejournal.com]

And, another twenty bucks is paid to the hype machine of "Twilight." I still think Buffy did it first, and Buffy did it better. And Buffy did it without postponing the next Harry Potter movie. *Nods*

[tiggz.livejournal.com]

i've said it before and i'll say it again. you can't compare the two. the only thing Buffy and Twilight have in common is vampire characters. and really SMeyer's vampires aren't like any other vampires that have ever been before. so you really can't even compare that.

i've never liked anything for the hype. the books are good, fluffy pieces of entertainment. if you're looking for masterpieces they aren't for you. but i'm getting a bit tired of people who haven't read the books bashing them just because of the fandom surrounding them. if i decided to never enjoy something because it had crazy fans, i'd never have nice things.

[ducky01.livejournal.com]

Actually, I'm not bashing them because of the fandoms surrounding them. I am bashing them because of the complete and utter overkill of "Twilight" that has flooded every form of media that has passed my eyeballs for the past six months. You're tired of the bashing, and I'm tired of this series being treated like it is the second coming of Christ. Guess we're both tired and need to take a nap, huh?

[tiggz.livejournal.com]

okay, but that's not the franchise's fault. the media always clings to the things they think teens are going to go nuts over in an attempt to be hip and reach that particular demographic. these days your teen demographic is a whole lot more lucrative than any other.

the same principal applies to crazy fandom as it does crazy media. don't judge something on the craziness surrounding it. judge it on the sum of its parts.

[ducky01.livejournal.com]

I don't think I would mind it so much if it were more a fan-driven media frenzy. I can live with insane fans, as I am one of them in regard to lots of other fandoms. But the media frenzy seems to be more driven by greed and profit on the part of the movie makers rather than any kind of concern for giving the fans something of quality. I think they rushed the movie out in order to turn a quick profit while the books are still "hot," and it seems like whenever the movie moguls do that, the quality seems to fall by the wayside. And yet, they are shoving it down my throat as though I will be somewhat lesser than a homo sapiens because I have not seen it.

I'm sure I will eventually sit down and read the books (though I have been told by reliable sources that I will detest "Breaking Dawn"). And, I will probably enjoy them. But I've still got a bad case of "wait and see if it lasts" before I jump into it just because everybody else did. I'm a rebel, you know!

[daintress.livejournal.com]

They're going to make MORE?? :(

[tiggz.livejournal.com]

oh absolutely! New Moon was greenlit the day after Twilight opened. supposedly the script is already done. i only hope and pray it's better than Twilight's. if the book was cliche, the movie was a million times worse.

[y-slaybelle.livejournal.com]

- the painfully slow kiss in Bella's bedroom.

Favorite scene! I had problems with the movie but I'm glad they did this one very well.

[killer-fiend.livejournal.com]

I'm glad someone else was able to cobble to together all the things I agree with about the movie.

The baseball scene and the bedroom kiss and when Bella meets the Cullens were probably my fav. parts in the whole movie. (yay for run on sentences...)

And OMG Charlie was spot on perfect. I loved him to itty bitty bits!!!

[evil-pod-13.livejournal.com]

Totally agreeing with you on all you said. I missed the great cafeteria scenes.

And the scene where Edward and Bella arrive the first time together at school with him wearing sunglasses was TOO short.

I missed a lot of the cool quotes. But I need to watch it in English soon ;)